It’s Time to Unite!

I have not been shy about my thoughts and feelings over the last 3 weeks since the trainwreck of a presidential debate. Now Biden has stepped down, and I’ve got a lot of feels and thoughts about that too.

I’m grateful he got the memo. Sad, he had to go out this way (death by a thousand criticisms). Grateful for his service. Grateful he stepped up for us when the race was winnable, and down when it no longer was.

Joe has gotten us here, but he will not get us there.

Now, it’s Kamala. I am team Kamala. 100%. I cannot wait to see what she does next. To watch her go from behind-the-scenes VP to out front will be phenomenal. I truly cannot wait!

And, I’m terrified.

Not of her leadership. She’s brilliant, experienced, talented, educated, collaborative, high-integrity, and wildly articulate. She’s under 60. I call that progress. What terrifies me has nothing to do with her, and everything to do with the coaching I imagine she is getting (and not getting) behind the scenes.

I worry that the leaders at the top of our political institutions are giving her bad advice. Advice about how to contort herself, instead of about how to be MORE of herself.

We do not need a presidential candidate who pretends and panders. We need a candidate (and a president!) who is real, principled, smart, strategic, articulate, authentic, believable, and committed to upholding her values and the values of our country.

This country is DYING for an authentic leader. The right has one. A guy who shows his true, albeit horrific, colors. Clearly, there is something appealing about authenticity. All of us are sick and tired of the same old, same old. Literally and figuratively speaking.

Unfortunately, I’ve seen this phenomenon too many times when “unexpected leaders” enter a new role — or the prospect of a new role. They are too often advised to “be a bit more like this, and a bit less like that”. The establishment tries to coach the woman out of the women. And this becomes orders of magnitude more intense when you add race and ethnicity to the equation. Because Kamala is a quintessential unexpected leader, in more ways than one, I worry about the advice she is getting from all of her well-intended advisors. I imagine all the “experts” advising her, “If you want people to trust you, listen to you, follow you, like you, vote for you, you better be ______ (fill in the blank).”

Picturing this scene makes me feel a little sick. It also makes me fantasize about a different, more dreamy, and inspiring scene.

I like imagining Kamala calling in all her best lady friends, colleagues, mentors, and fellow bad-ass women leaders — known and unknown to her — who have achieved extraordinary things, despite the haters. Leaders who somehow remained true to themselves amidst all the noise.

Many faces come to my mind when I picture a group of fierce and feminine women coming together for her. Michelle Obama, Stacey Abrams, Anita Hill, Liz Cheney, AOC, Indra Nooi, Queen Bey, Simone Biles, Geena Davis, Abby Wambach, Oprah Winfrey, Carla Harris, Martha Beck, and my dear friend Gwen Webber McLeod (who coined the term “unexpected leader” to describe those who do not look like the leaders who came before them). And yes, perhaps a few good men too–who are Team Kamala and Team Authenticity.

I picture her chosen group coming together for an unforgettable girls’ trip in a beautiful, spacious living room. Comfortable couches. Delicious food. Comfortable attire. And a gorgeous view. The kind of view that makes one believe anything is possible.

To get grounded. Get fierce. Pray. Meditate. Tap into their collective power, love, and imaginations. To dream up what is possible with Kamala at the helm. To get vulnerable. Face the inevitable fear. Get real. Gain strength. Cry, hug, laugh, scream, and UNITE.

I imagine Kamala surrounded by smart, powerful, resilient women like herself, who can remind her what is possible. Let her know she’s not alone. And give her loads of support, love, money, and encouragement.

I hope she has this inner circle to help her step into the most powerful and authentic, truest and most strategic, version of herself — as she builds her plans for our country and her unique voice.

I hope she has the fortitude to vote folks off the island if they bring angst, fear, hatred, or outdated and ineffective advice.

Conventional wisdom (and advice) got us here, but it’s not going to get us there.

Kamala needs people who will sit with her as she contemplates the important questions:

• What are my core values? How can I operate and speak from THAT place?
• What do I look like, sound like, and feel like (on the inside) when I am being my most authentic self? What do I need to do to operate from THAT place?
• Who are the people who trust me, respect me, believe in me, and have unwavering confidence in my capabilities as a leader? Those who will give me strategic feedback, and tell me the truth, while respecting mine. How can I surround myself with THOSE people?
• What is my unique style? What professional clothes make me feel most comfortable, confident, and authentic? Wear THAT. (P.S. This is no small thing.)

Kamala may think she doesn’t have time to reflect deeply on these questions or pull together a powerhouse set of women to bolster her. I can only imagine how chaotic and urgent everything feels. But I for one think this could be her first and best use of time as our new nominee.

You do you, Kamala!

You’ve got my vote.

Mitch Shepard is a Chief Truth-Teller, a trusted coach & adviser to some of the world’s top leaders, an applied behavioral scientist, an author, a passionate world traveler, a sought-after speaker, an inclusion strategist, a recovering Catholic, and an ass-kicker of cancer. HUMiNinc.com